do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
The struggles of a small town man whore
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize