he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Randomize
