I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
