shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
