Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
