my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
