Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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