lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
