Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize