We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
