I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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