ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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