HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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