Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Randomize
