I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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