I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
