Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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