I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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