We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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