You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
