I only kidnapped one of them. chill
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
