i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
All the doctor said was why
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
