Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
