I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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