'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
