are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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