I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
