just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
