so that wasnt chicken after all
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
