need another drink. this is the easiest way
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
