remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
