Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
He shit in the fireplace
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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