You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
