kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
What a dumb baby whore.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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