how can u be prego again
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
