sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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