I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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