i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
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I need you to use more vowels.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize