i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
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