I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Randomize
