just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Randomize
