I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
