I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
