the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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