is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
