he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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