she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
