small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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