let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
