You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
