holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
my liver is dry heaving
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize